if you were capt. kirk, you’d have hit this already

“3 out of this world love holes”

The above image and this here link come from the good folks at Gizmodo, who are always on the lookout for new horizons in technoperversity.

When I was a kid, we watched a lot of Star Trek reruns. Gene Roddenberry, Trek’s creator, wanted to promote tolerance and unity among all the races of humanity. Mostly by having Shatner shag a variety of blue-, red- and green-skinned alien hotties.

Now we have this “Area 51 Love Doll.” Leaving aside all other questions and prurient remarks, I have to wonder about the tri-boob thing. Seems we’ve evolved to possess either one or a pair of all our parts—and to be attracted to same. So three boobs?

Four, now—sure, I can see that. Four boobs is better than two; we can all do the math. But three?

I suppose it has something to do with keeping your mouth and hands equally occupied, so no one feels slighted?

Maybe there’s a community of tri-boob fantasists out there. Maybe the raw fact of its deviation from human norms is the attraction; if you’re going out shopping for a purple, vagina-mouthed alien blow-up doll, you’re probably not looking for a more or less representative specimen of the female of our species. So maybe tri-boob is right in your wheelhouse.

You freak.

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4 thoughts on “if you were capt. kirk, you’d have hit this already”

  1. my favorite so far, but definitely a male perspective. three boobs pose vast construction issues on many two boob flattering clothing options. sport’s bras would be nearly impossible.

  2. The next time they come through town, you should really catch “Gleeeknorb and the Tri-boob Fantasists.” They put on an AMAZING live show.

  3. ah yes, i’ve seen their fliers. “we turn your tri-boob fantasies into musical orgasms.”

    or so they claim . . .

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