Back to the Man Show with ye, Adam.
. . . By ABC/Disney, no less. Seems the powers-that-be in the Mouse House took a strong disliking to Evil’s campaign against Mickey’s write-in candidacy. And have chosen to respond by shamelessly ripping off the Evil’s material.
The setup: Evil regularly downloads ESPN’s podcasts. (ESPN is owned by ABC, in case you didn’t know.) One of his favorites is “The B.S. Report”, hosted by one Bill Simmons, a.k.a. the Sports Guy.
Well, lo and behold: during the July 22 podcast, Herr Simmons and funnyman Adam Carolla totally coincidentally got into a conversation about a song you might have . . . hmm . . . liked once, but have heard it so much now that you . . . hmm . . . don’t ever want to again. Would like to banish it, perhaps?
Sound familiar, FOEs?
Evil was willing to let this slide until Mr. Carolla then posited his one song never to hear again. Was it “Take My Breath Away”? Something by the BeeGees? “The Ballad of Bilbo Baggins”? Noooo.
It was “Hotel” fucking “California”.
Wow, fellas! No one has ever written about that!
Now. They say imitation is the sincerest form of flattery. Yeah—and clichés are the lamest form of bullshit.
But, you say, isn’t it possible Adam Carolla came to this conclusion independently of the Evil? Perhaps his opinion even predates the Evil’s?
Impossible! In every cosmology worth a damn, Evil is said to have sprung forth at the moment of creation or soon after. Whereas this Carolla character dribbled from his mother’s loins a mere 44 years ago.
It only got worse when Evil then listened to the “Thundering Herd” podcast from July 25, when host Colin Cowherd’s assistant noted that—gasp!—the Vatican has decreed it’s OK to believe in aliens! Way to stay on top of things, guys!
Clearly the ESPN research team is mainlining the Evil. And Evil understands—these poor souls have to provide content for multiple networks, radio programs, espn.com, and now former Man Show hosts. These humble drones struggle to find ways to make things like bowling, Golden Tee, and competitive walking sound interest while enduring a rain of “Boo-ya!”s from Stuart Scott. So the Evil feels a certain level of . . . hmm . . . it isn’t compassion . . . pity, maybe? . . . for them.
That said, the Evil would appreciate a little attribution, guys. Rip off if you will, but don’t forget the Evil.