david was of was (not was) speaks to the national evil! . . . or does he?


Have you seen this man? If so, tell him the Evil yanked this picture off his website and is sorry.

Here’s something:

Last May (the 19th, exactly one day after the Evil’s birthday and one month before Garfield’s), Evil posted this little nugget of musical rumination concerning Was (Not Was) and their once-ubiquitous single, “Walk the Dinosaur.” A few readers commented, more posts were posted, and time rolled on like a toddler aimlessly ramming his Big Wheel into the family minivan.

Now the plot thickens . . . or does it? (Yes, it’s pitifully obvious the Evil loves this hackneyed literary device . . . or does he?)

Three days ago, on March 6, a new comment appeared below said post. To spare you the agony of clicking the above link (oh that awful, awful clicking sound), Evil graciously reprints the comment . . . here:

Ok, firstly, it’s Sweetpea, not Sweat Pea, amigo! Secondly, WT Dinosaur has been in the Flintstones movie, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, the Dream team, Family Guy and next, Ice Age 3 with Queen Latifah singing it…think I’ll light another Cohiba with this here hundred…


Our commenter named himself “david was.” As in, David Was of Was (Not Was). And the related email address . . . well, with the journalist’s fierce dedication to the protection of his sources, Evil won’t reveal it. (You’ve heard all the hoohah about mama bears and their cubs? It pales in comparison.) But let it be know what it is distinctly, well, Was-ian.

Evil replied to this comment from “david was,” “david was” returned the favor . . . and so things stand.

Now. Evil is not so terminally consumed by his own ego that he automatically assumes the real David Was commented on his blog. After all, you, delicious readers, can name yourself whatever you durn well please when commenting here. One FOE dubbed herself Mary Tyler Moore (despite the fact that Evil in no way looks “just like” Buddy Holly).

On the other hand, Evil is the logical sort. (Though he hates logic puzzles; also the dedicated ironist, the Evil.) And he can’t think of any reason one would name himself (herself? itself?) “david was”, establish an appropriately Was-ian email account, and try to pass himself off as the real David Was.

Well. That’s not entirely true. Evil can think of a reason to do it, and can imagine the exact person who would. But that person would be the Evil himself. And as low as he might sink, he hasn’t reach the Mariana Trench of generating false commentors on his own blog. Not yet.

. . . So is it possible David Was himself has deigned to read and comment on the National Evil? ‘Tis a mystery, to be sure.

Evil knows you await the denoument with baited breath. Hold it . . . hold it . . .


3 thoughts on “david was of was (not was) speaks to the national evil! . . . or does he?”

  1. Wow, what a thrill! Although (I probably shouldn’t mention this, seeing as someone might be watching), but I’ve actually never heard that song before. That I remember. Of course, I had some severe head injuries courtesy of Providence’s finest that year, and I scrupulously avoid weddings (Raul had to hunt me down for weeks prior to my own).

    But, anyway, I’m jealous. Nobody I’ve written about has ever commented. In fact, hardly anybody ever comments. But, I now see the error of my ways — I’ve been aiming too high — Obama, Morrissey, Natt Weller. Lorca obviously can’t reply (or can he?), although God knows if Dalí were still alive he’d be googling his own name every morning and he’d probably have posted dozens of flatly mendacious, scandalous rumors about himself on the Haunt by now.

    Point is, I need to spend some time refocusing my sites if I’m ever to achieve comments of this caliber. Wonder what the guys in The Sweet are up to nowadays…

  2. i salute david was, if it’s really him, for commenting here. all of us who create should defend our creations as we would our own children (provided our children haven’t become unbearable yuppie pricks). actually, we should defend them more fiercely; eventually our children develop minds of their own and are out of our hands, but your creation is utterly helpless to defend itself.

    i would have done the same thing if i were him and happened to stumble upon the national evil. and hopefully in the same humor.

    but again, we may never know if it was the fo-real d. was . . .

  3. “One FOE dubbed herself Mary Tyler Moore (despite the fact that Evil in no way looks “just like” Buddy Holly).”

    Buddy Holly? Heavens no! You are so much more a Dick Powell, Evil darling.

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